Padre

Padre, what will we do without you? Today is the first snow since you have been gone and you would have loved it. Love with you was uncomplicated.

You loved cuddling, kitties, and gentle things. You did not love unpredictable, loud things.

Everything you did was done with complete presence – romping, begging, napping, loving us. You shepherded me though my darkest years. You were my bright place.

The morning you passed the light was pink and everything was soft and gentle. It was bitterly cold and the snowflakes were so light they didn’t have enough heaviness to fall and floated outside. You got one more time in the snow.

You were tired. You had always been so entirely alive. It was peaceful with us by your sides. You were not alone. When they took you away you looked just like you did as a new puppy.

With you it was all holy – the love, the grief, the fear, the hope, the birth, the death, the weight, the blood, the breath, the presence, the ache. You are one of my greatest gifts and you will forever be one of the greatest loves of my life, my P.